3 Months

I can't believe that on the 13th it will be three months since Ruby joined our family. I'll never forget it. I was so nervous and my hands were shaking. We (Steve, Adeline, me and my parents) boarded the van that took us to the office where we would see and touch our new baby for the first time. Of course, we saw pictures, but they were 7 months old. We were worried about her development. Our thoughts wandered to places: Can she walk? Can she sit? Will she know any words? Will she grieve as hard and the same way that Adeline did? Will we recognize her?

The ride was short, although my emotions were in a flurry. There were tears and prayers. I knew we were doing the right thing, but Adeline had been my main focus for three years. How would she handle it? Steve and I had devised a game plan that always had Adeline covered for the next few days; and thank goodness my parents were there.

We sat in the room crowded with families waiting anxiously and some who just met their children. Looking back, it's blurry with a few stand still moments that I will always have. We were the only family from our agency so we had individual attention and began paperwork before they brought out our darling Xin Jia Qi. Then we were told they were ready and Steve, Adeline and I walked up to the curtained off portion of the room. They brought her out and I knew it was her. There was a total recognition of that precious face. She was placed in Steve's arm while I watched in tears and Adeline says loudly, and with a smile, "So THAT'S how big Ruby is!"

She was quiet, so quiet. She came to us with a trusting caution. She didn't smile, but she watched everything and once in a while her little lip would tremble and two tears would squeeze out of her eyes. She just kept looking at everything around her, trying to process it all.

That's the moment. Here are some snapshots. All of us were changed in that moment. Ruby was given a family, but lost everything familiar. Adeline was blessed with a sister, someone to have the longest relationship in life with, Steve and I were handed a child who would be ours forever to love, guide and protect. At that moment we felt like a completed family of four.